Still seem to be stuck in the quicksand of depression, fear and anxiety. Sometimes it is all I can do to get out of bed and smile. Today seems to be one of those days. I know in my mind I really need to turn this around. So what am I going to do to help myself.
Know that you can do anything you set your mind to. So if you set you mind to being moody you will be moody.I need to set my mind to being happy. Feel happy even if my heart is not in it. Smile even if it is fake. For all practical purposes make everyone around me believe I am happy and having a good day regardless of what I feel inside. And before I know it I should start to feel better.
My mantra today: I am happy.
Friday, March 11, 2011
Monday, February 28, 2011
Trying to find my path
Ever feel like your life is going nowhere? Your stuck in a rut and everything seems so meaningless and out of control. I certainly feel that way right now and have felt this way for awhile now. It is like I am in this dense fog and can't find which way is forward or even up. It seems like fear and anxiety has me rooted in quick sand and I can't seem to move forward in life.
Today I hope to pull myself out of the quick sand and back to solid ground.
Today I hope to pull myself out of the quick sand and back to solid ground.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Goals
So I was roaming around Sparkpeople.com today getting things set up and reaffirming my goal to lose weight and live a healthier lifestyle. One of the Goals I can set up is called Develop Goal Setting Skills. Among the mini goals within this major goal is keeping a Goal Journal. Now this far into my education of this skill I am assuming that means a place to write down your goals and hold yourself accountable. So I figure why not here. This blog is about positive thinking and changing my life. Setting Goals is all part of that. I am will also repost the weight and health related goals in my diet and fitness journal.
There are so many areas in my life that really need work on. First I really want to feel better about myself in the short term. My self esteem is not at its best right now. I cut my hair short the other day just so I see something different in the mirror. And now I am noticing all the gray hair. So tonight I bought some hair dye. I know I know there are those of you thinking this is all superficial but I really do think it will help me feel younger and better about myself as I look in the mirror. I am also making a goal to clear up my acne and start wearing a little bit of makeup. So to try and write this in a goal format .....
Goal 1: Improve the way I look and feel about myself.
a. I will dye my hair to cover up all the grey hair.
b. I will use skin cleanser and clear up my acne.
c. I will use a little bit of make up to feel pretty.
d. I will take care of how I look and get dressed everyday.
e. I will wear clothes that fit me, instead of looking frumpy all the time.
I will work on the above items and do this everyday for a month.
Okay first goal written. I think I have forgotten some elements of goal writing in here, but I will refresh my memory of this skill and learn more as I go.
There are so many areas in my life that really need work on. First I really want to feel better about myself in the short term. My self esteem is not at its best right now. I cut my hair short the other day just so I see something different in the mirror. And now I am noticing all the gray hair. So tonight I bought some hair dye. I know I know there are those of you thinking this is all superficial but I really do think it will help me feel younger and better about myself as I look in the mirror. I am also making a goal to clear up my acne and start wearing a little bit of makeup. So to try and write this in a goal format .....
Goal 1: Improve the way I look and feel about myself.
a. I will dye my hair to cover up all the grey hair.
b. I will use skin cleanser and clear up my acne.
c. I will use a little bit of make up to feel pretty.
d. I will take care of how I look and get dressed everyday.
e. I will wear clothes that fit me, instead of looking frumpy all the time.
I will work on the above items and do this everyday for a month.
Okay first goal written. I think I have forgotten some elements of goal writing in here, but I will refresh my memory of this skill and learn more as I go.
Burns Depression Checklist score is 69
As part of my work towards positive thinking and turning my life around, I am working on learning how to change my thought processes when it comes to my depression. I am currently reading Dr Burns' book Feeling Good The New Mood Therapy to help me change the thought processes that keep me in my depression. One of the exercises he has you do early on in the book is a checklist to help you become aware of how depressed you are feeling. I found this checklist online and use it as a tool to keep myself aware week to week how I am doing.
When I started taking this test and reading this book my score was 98, I have come a long way.
My Burns Depression Score for Oct 25, based on my feelings for this past week is 69, severe depression.
I have decided to blog my score each week and how things are going for me as I work through the book, not only for myself as an outlet, in a journaling therapy kind of way but also to help encourage anyone else suffering from depression to not just give in to the crippling emotions and know that you can change the way you think and thus the way you feel.
When I started taking this test and reading this book my score was 98, I have come a long way.
My Burns Depression Score for Oct 25, based on my feelings for this past week is 69, severe depression.
I have decided to blog my score each week and how things are going for me as I work through the book, not only for myself as an outlet, in a journaling therapy kind of way but also to help encourage anyone else suffering from depression to not just give in to the crippling emotions and know that you can change the way you think and thus the way you feel.
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